Baking for the Office Holidays: “A Christmas Story” Theme

I remember when I was younger, going through the tv listings at the beginning of each week in December to look for “A Christmas Story”. It would only be on once or twice, on some never-watched channel, usually on a Sunday morning.

Well that’s all changed now that the masses have realized what a classic it is and we get 24 hours of it on Christmas day (thank you very much, TBS). And this year I decided to pay my own respects to “A Christmas Story” on its 30th anniversary.

There's nothing like  the soft glow of electric sex gleaming on the office snack table.

There’s nothing like the soft glow of electric sex gleaming on the office snack table.

I started with the Leg Lamp. My aunt gave me a mini Leg Lamp a few years ago and now I bring it to the office every December to get in the holiday spirit. I get a lot of compliments on it and decided it would be the perfect centerpiece.

(And if you want to plan ahead for next year you can order the official Leg Lamp cookie cutter. Or ice cube tray. Or salt and pepper shakers.)

fudge-sign
Next, I thought about Ralphie saying, “Oh, fuuuuudge.” Well that’s simple enough. First I made the Chocolate Kahlua Fudge that I grew up with, but it never set up. You can eat it with a spoon and enjoy it, but it never got solid enough to slice, I assume because I didn’t cook it long enough. Oh, fuuuuudge, indeed.

Thankfully I bought an extra tub of Marshmallow Creme and so I tried the Fantasy Fudge recipe on the back. Turns out Kraft knows more about recipes than they do about packaging (Can anyone pull the protective layer off the top of the jar just using those itty bitty tabs they give you? Who can get hold of those? I wound up stabbing it open with a knife.)

But I didn't say "fudge."

But I didn’t say “fudge.”

The fudge didn’t come out as chocolately as the Kahlua version, but it set up perfectly and cut into nice squares.

bunny-sign

The pink Deranged Easter Bunny Cookies were next on my list, but only because I found an Easter Bunny cookie cutter at the top of my cookie cutter tub. I made a regular sugar cookie recipe and added some pink food coloring gel. I really hate rolling out sugar cookies, but this wasn’t too bad, and since they were already pink I didn’t have to decorate them, just threw on a few pink sprinkles.

I probably could have put candy eyes on them, to make them extra deranged. Oh! Or glasses! Aw, why didn't I think of that before?

I probably could have put candy eyes on them, to make them extra deranged. Oh! Or glasses! Aw, why didn’t I think of that before?

Of course you can’t think about “A Christmas Story” and eating without thinking of Randy refusing to eat dinner. I wanted to recreate his meal so that people could show me how the piggies eat, so I whipped up some meringues (using Martha’s recipe but shaping the meringue in piles like mashed potatoes instead of piping them into mushrooms) and then I sliced my brownies to look like slices of meatloaf.

Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.

Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.

I forgot the chocolate sauce gravy, but it still looked pretty good. Nobody would put their face in it for me though. So disappointing.

You know you want to put your face in this.

You know you want to put your face in this.

I rounded out the table with some store-bough treats, including Red Ryder BB Gum Drops and Cuz You Know It’ll Stick Toffees.

What, you wanted me to put out actual ammunition?

What, you wanted me to put out actual ammunition?

And then there was the Ovaltine. Oh, Ovaltine. I think this might have been my favorite thing on the table, and not just because I didn’t have to make it from scratch. Ovaltine is the taste of my 1980’s childhood, and as soon as I opened the jar and got a whiff of the chocolate crystals it was like travelling back in time. I didn’t want to leave a gallon of milk sitting out all afternoon though, so I made it a BYO treat.

A crummy commercial? Son of a bitch!

A crummy commercial? Son of a bitch!

The cookie I didn’t have time to make was a Scott Farkus Ginger Cookie. I was going to give it yellow M&M eyes and edible ball bearings for a mouth full of braces. That would have been awesome, right? I’ll add that to the list for next year.

What to eat first? It's always an office dilemma.

What to eat first? It’s always an office dilemma.

Want some more ideas? How about I Can’t Put My Arms Downuts or I Triple-Chocolate Triple-Dog Dare You Cookies. Maybe You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out, Kid candies in the shape of eyeballs? I’m sure I saw that mold around Halloween.

Have any other ideas I should try next year? Leave a comment below.

It’s a major award!
Lisa

Categories: Baking Holidays, Cookies, Office Holiday Parties, Theme Parties | Tags: , | 3 Comments

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3 thoughts on “Baking for the Office Holidays: “A Christmas Story” Theme

  1. Awesome creativity!

  2. ((sigh)) Miss you.

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